I can't tell you how many times I've been asked the questions, "Where do you go to school and what are you going for?" It ceaselessly follows me like a drenched dog that you don't want shaking it's slobbery, wet body by you. But oh, it shakes, and leaves you feeling slimey, gross, and wondering, 'How the hell did I end up here?'
These are not simple small-talk questions that you can ask me, people!
There are hidden complexities, uncertainty, and an array of other ridiculous emotions that come with asking these questions. I've grown so numb to the familiar words that all I utter now is "I don't know" to get them all to shut up and stop reminding me of the misery I face in my own head every day. I apologize for not muttering something exciting like Geneticist or Doctor to make your miserable day a little better. This is me, remember? I do the bare minimum and get by- do you really think I have planned that far ahead? By now, most of the people I went to high school with are rolling in a steep salary. Good for them, but as much as I'd like to be making that kind of money, I'd like to figure out how to get there first by taking my time.
As of right now, I am regrettably attending college to quell my parent's desires. That's how it's been since I started. But hopefully soon, I will start attending college for me too, for something that I actually want to learn about as a career.
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